This is a subject a lot of Christians, myself included, seem to overlook. Because many of us fall into the trap of mistaking self-loathing for humility. We read all the time in the Bible about how Jesus instructs us to turn the other cheek, to love our enemies, and pray for them. We are expected to love one another, sacrifice for one another, pray for one another, and do everything we can to lift up others before ourselves. Yet the number of verses that talk about what we should do for ourselves is remarkably smaller. As such, many Christians assume that they aren't supposed to take care of themselves at all. Since "The Son of Man had no place to lay his head," they don't either. They pour themselves out completely for the sake of their fellow man, sacrificing time, money, and effort just to accommodate everyone around them, and inevitably leading to burnout and total exhaustion. But it's all worth it to live as He lived. They believe that any sort of accommodation for themselves is automatically selfish and therefore sinful, and I used to believe that as well.
Turns out, I was a little off-base.
While the Bible doesn't outright spell out how you're supposed to treat yourself, there are many verses where it's implied. After Jesus had fasted for 40 days and endured being tempted in the desert by Satan, angels came to him and attended him, probably offering Him food and rest. Several times, Jesus would withdraw from the crowds and even his own disciples in order to be alone with the Father. He would pray to the Father, mourn his cousin's death, and prepare the next step of his ministry. So if it's okay for Him to set boundaries, it's okay for us to as well.
Think about it: Can you help someone build a house if your own is in shambles? Can you someone deal with a traumatic experience if your own mind is in turmoil? Can you lend food to another if your own fridge is empty? Can you show love to someone if you hate yourself?
To use an airplane metaphor, you need to put your own mask on first before you help someone else. That doesn't mean you deliberately neglect other people to feel lazy, but just recognize that you have limits. Something I've had to relearn over and over again is that I can't help everyone. Set time aside for yourself and stay firm with it. If your loved ones really care, they'll understand. And whomever you do decided to help will probably appreciated it more if you help them while rested instead of burnt-out.
Just...if Jesus loved you enough to save you, then you can love yourself the way He loves you.
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